Category: Prank calls
Format: Subtitled
Characters: Abdo, Rakesh, Russell
Prank Victim: Drum teacher
Rage Level: Feel-good
Best quotes:
- “I WILL BRING YOU A FRESH GLASS OF MILK FROM THE TIT OF MY WIFE, FRESH!”
- “The scientific name for it is The Cylindrical Shawarma TITANIUM ULTRA SANDWICH MAKER.”
- “I will bring you the guava juice, I will squeeze the orange juice from my hand, and the sweat from my forehead I will put in the glass, serve it to you and then we can play the drums together.”
Body of content:
I prank called a guy in India who offers tabla (drum) lessons. I made a mistake with the time zone conversion and ended up accidentally calling him at 4AM, and he answered! Despite being super groggy, he was polite and stayed on the phone through Abdo’s antics.
Did you enjoy my ridiculous singing in this drum lesson prank call? What places in India should I call next time? Tell me your ideas in the comments below!
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Transcript
[phone ringing]
Guy: Hello?
Pranker: Uh, hello?
Guy: Yes?
Pranker: Yes! I saw your advertisement for uh... For he tabla playing?
Guy: Yes.
Pranker: So, I want to hear about what you can do for the teaching and uh, what your price is...
Pranker: ... and this things.
Guy: I charge uh, 1000 Rupee.
Pranker: Okay! Alright. That's a no problem, I can I-I think I can do that.
Pranker: Uh, there is one specific song I want to learn how to play it for my wife.
Pranker: She is uh, from India. And uh, I want to surprise her.
Pranker: Have you heard of the guy, his name is MC eh, PUNJABI?
Guy: Uh- I wouldn't know, I'm sorry.
Pranker: Okay, maybe I can try to rem- to remind you. Uh...
Pranker: The song it goes like uh, it sounds like this, it goes...
Pranker: [singing the melody]
Guy: Ay-
Pranker: [singing]
Pranker: You know this one?
Pranker: Yeah, I know that song.
Pranker: Okay, excellent. Can you help me with- to learn how to do this?
Guy: Yeah, I can- I can teach you when you need to practice and I'll teach you what to do.
Pranker: But you know-
Guy: The lessons you need to practice. Because it- it's 4.30 in the morning...
Guy: ... and you just woke me up.
Pranker: Oh, I'm sorry I don't- see in- in my country we- we start the day at like 3.30 - 4.
Guy: Yeah.
Pranker: I'm sorry if I- if I wake. Uh...
Guy: Tha- that's okay, that's okay, that's okay! Anyways I've got a- I've got a class in about 6:00.
Pranker: Okay m-maybe you can give me like a whisper like a [singing] like that!
Guy: If you give me a call...
Pranker: Mister-
Guy: ... after 1 and a half hour.
Pranker: II-I don't know, are you crazy? You want me to call you at 6 in the morning, come on man.
Pranker: I have manners, right?
Guy: That- That's okay, 6 in the morning is okay! You called me at 4:35 in the morning.
Pranker: Yeah, yeah-
Guy: So... It doesn't matter when one and-
Pranker: B-But you sound like very awake. Than-thank god you sound like you're not sleeping so I-I would've felt bad.
Guy: So you- you- you -you can- you can come down some time in the evening or if you want me to come to your place and teach you I can do that as well.
Pranker: Okay, how about we do like uh tonight at like uh 12:30 am? You can do it?
Guy: [chuckles] I woul-I wou- I would teach in the night. Uh...
Guy: See I- I start off teaching at 6 am in the morning.
Pranker: Okay well yeah I kn- I start my day at like 10 o'clock pm.
Pranker: I have to get up, have like a breakfast. You know maybe I can invite you over uh...
Pranker: ... we can have like breakfast uh, you know, like a 2am.
Guy: Uh, thank you so much but then 2am, is the time which uhm...
Guy: You know I-I'll be in the bed.
Pranker: Look, look, in the Arabian culture, you cannot say no, it's very rude man.
Pranker: I'm offering you the food you cannot say no to me.
Guy: I am sorry- I am sorry.
Pranker: No, stop it, stop it...
Guy:: I am sorry I'm not trying to be rude, I'm not trying to be rude...
Pranker: No, you're being- you're making like a rude to me, come on man.
Pranker: It's only-it's like a perfect time to have like for you- you want to come now?
Guy: [chuckles] Thank you so much, I'm I'm very happy that uh, you want to learn at that point of time but...
Guy: ... uh, 2am or 12am in the mor- morning-
Pranker: I will make you the best late night snack you ever had okay?
Pranker: I will bring you the mango lassi, I will bring you the mango juice.
Pranker: I will bring you the guava juice, I will squeeze the orange juice from my hand.
Pranker: And the sweat from my forehead I will put in the glass, serve it to you and then we can play the drums together.
Guy: [giggles] I can't do that. Sorry about that! See, we have certain times uhm...
Pranker: I WILL BRING YOU A FRESH GLASS OF MILK FROM THE TIT OF MY WIFE, FRESH!
Guy: I'm sorry, I didn't understand that.
Pranker: I said, I will bring you a glass of delicate fresh from the cow milk.
Guy: The cow?
Pranker: Sometimes I-I insult my wife, I refer to her as like a animal.
Guy: It's okay, uhm... [exhale] See I am more into-
Pranker: No! Come on man, don't turn me down I get like a so offended now.
Pranker: I am in your country I want to invite you I'll have you exotic meal, five course dinner...
Pranker: I will make you like a dessert in the end, I will put like a cherry on top and a syrup cupcake.
GuY: So where do you live?
Pranker: Uh, Bangalore.
Guy: Where in Bangalore?
Pranker: In the middle.
Guy: I'm sorry?
Pranker: In the middle of it.
Guy: Yeah in the middle of it- whe-where in the middle of it?
Pranker: I am equal distant from all areas right? I made sure we had like a place right in the heart of bangalore.
Guy: yeah but where- where are you right now? I mean do you have an address?
Pranker: Mister- mister stupid! Pull out a map out and look in the middle of bangalore!
Pranker: Put your finger on it, BOOM, right there!
Guy: [chuckles] That sounds funny!
Pranker: Okay if you want to get like uh, one- what do they call it? The...
Pranker: The device that makes like a circle like a uh... a protractor!
Pranker: You want to get like a protractor you can measure like a one inch from the middl-
Guy: See- see- see if I have to come down to your place I need to know how far should I be traveling, so go ahead and tell me...
Pranker: No- Look, look, look okay, look you know what?
Pranker: Just because you sound like a good guy I will bring you the food with me in- on my-
Pranker: I will carry it on my back to bring it to you with the mango lassi and the tit from my wife.
Pranker: And the milk from my wife!
Guy: I mean I'm not able to comprehend with what you're saying.
Pranker: Okay...
Guy: Uh... Your- your-
Pranker: I'm going to travel on my donkey. I will bring you the full course meal...
Pranker: I will bring you a dessert, I will bring you a cupcake!
Pranker: I will bring you one fresh glass of milk from the tit of my wife.
Pranker: She just bear two children, she has like a prime uh, prime uh... TIT.
Guy: I wouldn't uh... want all those things. All you need to do it get your tabla.
Guy: Uh... Sometime in-in the morning or in the evening and you can learn-
Pranker: Okay look, look man l-le- why- I-I-I told you I'm sleeping.
Pranker: Let's do it like uh 4:00 right like-like-like this time tomorrow.
Guy: 4:00 at this time uh... See I wouldn't want to disturb my folks here uh...
Guy: They will be sleeping at that point of time. At 4:00 in the morning.
Pranker: You know what? You're a great guy, we could have like a sleep over!
Pranker: We can do like a whisper, we can be like [singing]
Pranker: Then we can do like a just soft playing like [tapping softly]
Guy: [laughing] Tabla can not be whisper. Cannot do so much eh...
Pranker: We can do it! We can do it my friend I'm telling you, we can do it together.
Guy: Uhm, at 4:30 in the morning, uh I will not be able to teach you.
Guy: So if you can come down at around 6 am or 7 am in the morning.
Pranker: Man but I- I will- I will be like a zombie man. That's so late.
Guy: I-I will not be able-
Pranker: You know it will be like uh like uh- like a just sleeping guy man.
Pranker: I don't know I won't be able to do anything I- I will come to your house and take a nap.
Guy: Okay, out of curiosity I just wanna ask you uh, something. Where do you work?
Pranker: Actually, interesting enough uh, do you know Shawarma sandwich?
Pranker: I help to patent the metal rod inside it.
Pranker: With the mixture of metal and different type of uh chemical reaction...
Pranker: ... we look at like the periodic table of elements we go throught like uh...
Pranker: Hydrogen, Carbon Monoxide and we make like uh...
Pranker: A special uh rotational uh, for even cooking for the shawarma sandwich.
Guy: Okay... [laughing]
Pranker: I'm-Yo-yo-yo man I know maybe you think it's funny but this is a multi-multi- million rupee industry.
Guy: Okay.
Pranker: It's- it's basically-
Guy: Alright.
Pranker: The-the scientific name for it is The Cylindrical Shawarma TITANIUM ULTRA SANDWICH MAKER.
Guy: Okay.
Pranker: But it-it-it look, look! I have a patent okay? So don't try-
Pranker: I told you a little bit of my secret here, my chemical formula, the monoxide...
Pranker: Don't do that to me.
Guy: I wouldn't- I wouldn't understand what you said also, so that doesn't matter.
Pranker: Okay. What about the- You do Skype? You do video lessons? By any chance?
Guy: I don't have Skype. I do not have Skype.
Pranker: You don't have it? Ah...
Pranker: But- ca- can you make like a load down uh, download?
Guy: I can download Skype.
Pranker: Okay.
Guy: So uh, give me your Skype ID and password so probably uh...
Pranker: No- I can't- I can't do it man- I can't give you my password man.
Guy: We can- we can do-
Pranker: Come on I know we just met and everything but let's not get ahead of ourselves.
Pranker: I can't- like maybe-
Guy: I'm not- not- not your password! Not your-
Guy: I do not want your password...
Pranker: Oh- but you- you say-
Guy: Give me your-
Pranker: I thought-
Guy: ... ID-
Pranker: Alright, I was gonna be like yeah man give me your car keys. You know I was gonna put it in perspective for you but yeah.
Pranker: Alright, I will- I will uh I will give you a text message with this...
Pranker: ... and we will talk about it again.
Guy: Okay, fine! Tha-that's fine then.
Pranker: Okay r- wha-why are you getting so agitated man, I don't understand uh...
Guy: I'm not- I am not- I'm not agitated-
Pranker [speaking as Russell]: You're getting all riled up-
Guy: I'm just talking to you because- I'm sorry?
Pranker [speaking as Abdo]: I said you're getting all riled up here.
Guy: No, no, no, it's definitely not like that.
Guy: Because I just woke up from sleep so probably uhm... Maybe I might sound a little weird when I uh-
Guy: ... get up from bed. I'm not agitated at all.
Pranker [speaking as Russell]: Oh no, you- you should be woken up by now man.
Guy: I'm - I'm- I- I just woke up uhhh, just got to get freshed up and to go out.
Guy: I'm going to uh, student's house.
Pranker [speaking as Rakesh]: But can I come too?
Guy: Oh you also can-
Pranker: Okay, what is address?
Guy: So where are you living in Bangalore?
Pranker: Right in the middle my friend, I told you already.
Guy: Right in the middle?
Pranker: Right.
Guy: So I just wanted to know where in the middle? Because- I
Pranker: Okay look, you take- look you take- you take a protractor right?
Pranker: You rotating, rotating... Say it with me. Rotating. Boom.
Guy: Fair enough. Meet me near [censured] Hospital.
Pranker: Okay! Alright.
Guy: See you this morning.
Pranker: Alright.
Guy: Okay.
Pranker: See you there right now. Okay! Give me the kiss.
Pranker: Hell-
Pranker: [laughing]