Category: Robbery pranks, Prank call
Format: Subtitled
Characters: Russell
Prank Victim: Bike owner
Rage Level: Hardcore
Best quotes:
- “If you’re trying to scam me or something, I’M THE SCAMMER!”
- “You’re old school and a farking dumbass”
- “You’re a little pansy bikeless motherfarking bitch!”
Body of content:
This guy listed his $2,000 stolen bike on Craigslist in an attempt to find it. I responded to the ad pretending to be someone with the bike in my possession, and we set up a time to speak on the phone. Obviously the bike theft hit him hard and he was eager to get it back, but he wasn’t keen on Russell trying to negotiate a reward for being willing to return it!
When I pushed the boundaries during the prank call and asked for $1500 to give the bike back, he threatened to trace the call (good luck!) and send the cops to get his bike back for him. Was Russell’s deal fair? Do you think any REAL bike thief would offer to bring it back, even for money? Let me know what you thought of the stolen bike prank call in the comments below!
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Transcript
Pranker [speaking to audience]: This guy had an ad up on Craigslist trying to find his stolen custom bike.
Pranker: I responded to the post acting like I have his bike in hand.
Pranker: We set up a time to chat on the phone. He was pretty eager to speak with me.
[phone ringing]
Guy: Hello?
Pranker [speaking as Russell]: Hey.
Guy: What's up man? Y-you really did get that bike from somebody?
Pranker: Yeah, yeah, so, uh... I s-
Guy: It's a 2000$ bike, dude. [chuckles]
Pranker: I saw some-
Pranker: It's 2 Gs? Damn, son.
Guy: Yeah.
Pranker: Wow, I was- I was about to give it back to you for like 200$.
Guy: Who did you get it from?
Pranker: Uhm-
Guy: Some Craigslist or something?
Pranker: Well- [sigh] Yeah, I have it.
Pranker: But yeah, Nick, so what do you suggest we do about it?
Guy: I don't know. Whatever you think's right man.
Pranker: Yeah... So you paid 2000?
Guy: It's got GPS on it, but somebody must've uhm- deactivated.
Pranker: Yeah, I-I-I took that thing apart like, I couldn't YOU KNOW, risk having it TRIANGULATED so...
Pranker: ... yeah, uhh, so you want to like TRADE FOR IT OR SOMETHING?
Pranker: What do you got to offer me if I wanted to like, give you an even trade?
Guy: I don't know what I got, uhm...
Pranker: You got a car you can give me or anything like that?
Pranker: Like an old one?
Guy: No, I ain't got no car...
Pranker: Oh, okay... Uhh, what about like a-like a- like a...
Pranker: ... like a small like apartment, like a... Like a bedroom, like-like a...
Pranker: ... like do you have possibly like a room you could rent out to me for a month or so, or...
Guy: I ain't got none of that, no.
Pranker: So I was wondering like, c-c-could you toss me like uhh...
Pranker: ... 1500$ and I'll-I'll bring it back to you or what you want to do?
Guy: 1500$?!
Pranker: Yeah.
Guy: How about I just got this call TRACED so the cops are about to be by your house in about 2 seconds later?
Pranker: I mean, that's fine too- [phone call ends]
Pranker: [laughing] I'm calling back...
Pranker [speaking to audience]: He's like farking so smooth, dude he's so high man...
Pranker: He's like dizzy right now. I should...
[phone ringing]
Guy: HELLO?
Pranker: Hey man, what happened? I think we got disconnected earlier.
Guy: Dude, dude, look, this crap ain't- this crap ain't leading up to nothing bruh...
Pranker: What're you talking about bro? Look-
Guy: LOOK. NAH-
Praanker: Let's get to the bottom of this. Let's talk about it.
Guy: No, no let me tell you something, let me tell you some-
Pranker: Alright. Alright. Go ahead.
Guy: MY BIKE GOT STOLEN.
Pranker: Yeah.
Guy: And you're trying to- look, I'm not a fool, bruh.
Guy: You can't- y- If you're trying to SCAM ME or something, I'M THE SCAMMER.
Guy: You know what I'm saying?
Pranker: You're te scam-
Guy: My bike got stolen, and you're trying to get money from me bruh?
Pranker: Yeah, I mean you're the dumbass-
Guy: WHAT THE FARKING CRAP IS THAT? MAN WHAT KIND OF CRAP IS THAT BRUH?
Pranker: Listen!
Pranker: Look, motherfarker, you're the dumbass who told me it was 2000$!
Pranker: The first thing you said to me was it was 2 grand.
Pranker: I was going to give it to you for a hundred bucks!
Guy: Well what the fark I'MA PAY MONEY TO GET MY FARKING BIKE BACK!
Pranker: Well, I guess you ain't getting bike back then.
Guy: HOW ABOUT I FARKING GET THE COPS AND TRACK YOUR FARKING ASS DOWN?
Pranker: That's not going to happen, homeboy.
Pranker: Homeboy, I'm trying to work with you here. Let's meet the halfway.
Guy: Man, MEET HALFWAY?
Pranker: Yeah, like we- like- you ever heard of negotiating?
Pranker: You don't have to like-
Guy: Wait, [indistinct speaking]
Pranker: Yeah!
Guy: Why would I pay MONEY BRUH for a bike that got stolen?
Pranker: Because- because-
Guy: YOU AIN'T SOUNDING RIGHT BRUH, you need to listen, HEAR YOURSELF OUT BRUH.
Pranker: Uh...
Guy: Hear yourself out, man.
Pranker: I know it sounds really REASONABLE MAN! GOD!
Guy: No it don't man!
Pranker: Listen, I-
Guy: I think you're trying to scam people bruh.
Pranker: Bruh-
Guy: That crap's old man. I'm old school, bruh. You cannot scam me man.
Pranker: You're old school and a farking dumbass so yes...
Pranker: ... I'm not trying to scam you, but let's farking work on this!
Guy: THE DUMBASS IS THE ONE THAT TOOK THREE DAYS TO CALL BACK.
Pranker: Yeah, because I was mapping out the game plan, son.
Guy: The dumbass-
Guy: The dumbass is the one that calls from a phone and I call it back and it's...
Guy: ... another person answers.
Pranker: Exactly. Because I-I'm not a dumbass, I'ma motherfarking genius!
Guy: Get out of here with all that dude...
Guy: You're a farking phony dude...
Pranker: [clucking] dude-
Guy: DUDE YOU A PHONY FARKING BITCH!
Pranker: Look dawg, you're a little pansy bikeless motherfarking bitch!
Pranker: Why you talking crap to me? [phone call ends]
Pranker: [laughing] He hung up... Oh man...
