Category: Prank calls
Format: Subtitled
Characters: Rakesh
Prank Victim: Drunk girl
Rage Level: Hardcore
Best quotes:
- “LISTEN. DO YOU WANT ME TO BRING YOU A SANDWICH OR SOMETHING?”
- “What are you talking, praise Allah time? Is that what the time says?”
- “Take your flying carpet and come over here.”
Body of content:
I called a lady as Rakesh pretending to be with the Bernie Sanders campaign, it ended up totally spinning out in a direction I did NOT expect. This girl was clearly DRUNK and couldn’t help but slur her words through the whole prank call! She immediately started insulting Rakesh with the craziest statements that you could only expect from a drunk person.
You can’t miss this hysterical drunk girl prank call - it went so much wilder than I could have expected. Should I try to call her again and see if she still can’t stand Rakesh? Let me know what you thought of this interaction in the comments below!
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Transcript
[phone ringing]
Lady: Hello?
Pranker [speaking as Rakesh]: Yeah, hello, what's popping my doggie? Eh, my name is Rakesh and I'm calling with Bernie Sanders campaign, how are you doing?
Lady: The what company?
Pranker: No, Bernie Sanders campaign, not company right? You silly goose.
Lady: No, I don't know what you're talking about.
Pranker: Yeah Bernie Sanders you know, like the old guy look like Einstein, running for president?
Lady: Mhm yeah...
Pranker: Yeah, yeah, him right. So I'm wondering, you know, can I count on your vote in the upcoming election for our home doggie Bernie?
Lady: No I'm not- No. I'm not voting.
Pranker: But why not?
Lady: Don't feel like it.
Pranker: But you're being too lazy right now, you're being so lazy right? So lazy.
Lady: Hmm, yeah, ok, alright-
Pranker: But- why- why, are you overweight? I can help you with diet plan so by the time November comes around you can go make a voting, right?
Lady: Yeah, oh I see that's a great idea, why don't you go to hell?
Pranker: Okay-
Lady: Bye!
Pranker: Go to hell- what do you say to me mother ugly?? [phone call ends]
Pranker: [laughing]
[phone ringing]
Lady: Are you that bored [mumbling] you farking dothead motherfarker.
Pranker: Look, tubby lumpinks calm down? Hello?
Pranker: [laughing] She said you dothead motherfarker, what the fark? [laughing]
[phone ringing]
Lady: What is wrong with you?
Pranker: Look, I'll-
Lady: WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? FARKING TERRORIST
Pranker: Look,- WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Lady: TERRORIST MOTHERFARKER!
Pranker: Motherugly! YOU STOP IT! FARK TO YOU RIGHT? What did- HELL-
Pranker: [laughing] This- this lady...
[phone ringing]
Lady: Why do you keep calling me?
Pranker: I need you to apologize about what you said about me. Me feelings is hurting so bad.
Lady: Good, you're terrorist and a**hole, wanna come here so I can kick your ass?
Pranker: Okay I'll come right now motherugly. What is address, I will come, right.
Lady: 33 [censored]
Pranker: 33 [censored]
Lady: Hop on!
Pranker: Okay.
Lady: That's right. That's probably over pass I'll be waiting for you. So come on.
Pranker: Okay lo-
Lady: Bring it on.
Pranker: Okay but do you wa-
Lady: Bring it on.
Pranker: Do you want me to be- do you want-
Lady: Bring it on motherfarker.
Pranker: LISTEN. DO YOU WANT ME TO BRING YOU A SANDWICH OR SOMETHING?
Lady: Bring it on you farking terorristic motherfarker dot head motherfarker, I know who this is, so just come over. I'll wait for you.
Pranker: What are- What are you- are you drunk or something? What the fark is wrong with you right?
Lady: Oh no, I'm totally sober.
Pranker: No, you sound-
Lady: [mumbling] I'm gonna kick you ass. I'm gonna kill you so bad you'll be [mumbling] bring the cops with you so they can arrest me after I kill you.
Pranker: Wow, you are slurr- you are slurring your words like no tomorrow it-
Lady: I will stab you in the heart and watch you die.
Pranker: Listen it is literally like noon right now and you're drunk. How does it feel you farking loser?
Lady: It's 12 o'clock, really? Is that how you tell time you stupid fark?
Lady: What time it is, praise Allah time? Is that what the time says? You from farking India? Is that where you are?
Pranker: O- You know, it's going to be very hard to subtitle this, man. You- you're slurring so much!
Lady: Who the fark do you think you are talking to me the way you're talking to me? You don't know me.
Pranker: But oh my God- You sound like you're having-
Lady: Why you having bam- DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM, WHY YOU HIDING DOWN WHO YOU ARE?
Pranker: [making noise] Now I sound like you right?
Lady: You know what? Just come over here. I'm waiting.
Pranker: Okay, can you make us some tea or something? Make it ready?
Lady: No! Come over here and then I'll- I'll give you something- I'll give you something if you come over- I'll give you some when you come over.
Pranker: Oh my God, man I-
Lady: Who the fark are you? Who are you, who is this? Who is this farking with me because I don't think this like [mumbling] you-
Lady: My husband comes home he's gonna kick your ass too. So what are we doing?
Pranker: Oh God, man the subtitle-
Lady: Tell me!
Pranker: The subtitles- the subtitles will be so hard!Man the subtitles-
Lady: [mumbling]
Lady: Why you hiding on the phone? Why you can't come on [mumbling]
Pranker: Oh my god. CAN YOU PLEASE, PLEASE I AM BEGGING YOU PLEASE TALK CLEAR-
Lady: So just shut the fark up you terrorist. This is mother country because you are an a**hole.
Lady: Who is this and why are you calling me?
Pranker: Oh my God- oh my-
Lady: Just tell me who you are just tell me who you are and stop hiding on the telephone. Tell me who you are.
Pranker: Oh my-
Pranker: I am Rakesh. I am Rakesh.
Lady: Rakesh? Okay Allah- Okay come over here because I have a couple of hours- I'll have to leave so come over-
Pranker: But-
Lady: I'll kick your ass down and then I'll go [mumbling]
Pranker: Where do you have to go in two hours?
Lady: None of your farking business!
Pranker: I'm just saying, you're too drunk to go anywhere right? So you're gonna be at home, what the fark are you lying to me?
Lady: Did you just call me motherfarker?
Pranker: Right, I did.
Lady: I'LL COME TO YOU I KNOW YOUR IN PALU, SO WHERE IS IT? Give me your address I'll be there. I'll come over.
Pranker: Ok-
Lady: [mumbling]
Pranker: Okay, but I don't- I don't really recommend drunk driving, so if you can just you know-
Lady: I don't care what you recommend you farking a**hole. You know what I come here that's where...
Pranker: But you're so- God, you're killing me right-
Lady: WHY ARE YOU FARK WITH ME? DON'T JUST KEEP QUESTIONING ME, WHY ARE YOU FARKING WITH ME?
Pranker: Because you are a- because you're a crazy bitch!
Lady: [screaming]
Pranker: I told you already!
Lady: [mumbling]
Pranker: I can uh, I-
Lady: Come here I- now come here.
Pranker: I-
Lady: Take your flying carpet and come over here.
Pranker: Uh- m-my magic carpet?
Lady: Get on your camel and come over here.
Pranker: My- big one?
Lady: Take Uber and come over here. I'm waiting.
Pranker: Okay, Uber is more realistic.
Lady: [mumbling]
Pranker: [imitating her] If I call you in 2 hours will you sober up a little bit?
Lady: No, if you call me in 2 hours I'm gonna come to your farking house and kick your ass.
Pranker: No but I need to ta-
Lady: I can trace this call with the cops. I do that all the time.
Pranker: All the time, right? All the time, on the daily you trace the calls right? All the time.
Lady: [mumbling]
Pranker: Okay do it!
Lady: Piss me off. Piss me off. Piss me off
Pranker: Do it. Do it. Do it.
Lady: Who is this guy on- [mumbling]
Pranker: Okay.
Pranker: DO IT!
Lady: Who is this?
Pranker: DO IT! DO IT!
Lady: Who are you?
Pranker: MOTHERUGLY I SAID DO IT!
Lady: Who are you? I don't have any enemies so I can't think of who it could be.
Pranker: Yeah, yeah, but you trace calls all the time so, do it.
Lady: I have your phone numbers, I have them all right here. [mumbling] Caller ID-
Pranker: [imitating]
Lady: [mumbling]
Lady: Wat the fark is wrong with you, are you farking stupid? ARE YOU FARKING STUPID?
Pranker: [imitating] What? [phone call ends]
Pranker: [laughing] She hung up! Oh my god, the subtitles on that! Oh, she was slurring so much!