Category: Prank calls, Craigslist and Backpage Pranks
Format: Subtitled
Characters: Buk Lau, Tyrone, Juan
Prank Victim: Used underwear seller
Rage Level: Mellow
Best quotes:
- “Does it cost extra for yeast infection, or same price?”
- “Do you have a smelly vagina?”
- “So there’s no like a yeast-infection-or-your-money back type of thing, right?”
Body of content:
I pulled this gross used panties prank call on a woman who sells her underwear on Craigslist. As Buk Lau, I told her I was interested in buying a pair that had been worn for an EXTRA long time, plus a few other creepy requests. Check out how she responded to the Ownage character’s weird panty requests! What other strange operations should I prank call? Tell me in the comments!
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Transcript
Pranker [speaking as Buk Lau]: Like, does it cost extra for a yeast infection or same price?
Lady: I- I can't- I can't guarantee a yeast infection.
[glass break sound] [phone ringing]
Lady: Hello?
Pranker: Uh yeah, hello, how are you doing sweetie pie?
Lady: I'm good, how are you?
Pranker: I am excellent, thank you, honestly, I've been trying to reach you for a few days now about your advertisement.
Lady: Advertisement where?
Pranker: Uh yeah, on the Craiglisting you know, you have that advertisement about the yummy pair, how it's like a so delicious, you know?
Lady: OH OKAY, yeah.
Pranker: So I want to see, you know, I want to make the order, I want to make one order or two order, but uh-
Pranker: I was hoping that if I pay in advance, you can wear it for like a week or something like that.
Lady: Five days is my maximum. You want five days?
Pranker: Okay, WHAT ABOUT IF I toss you like a extra uh 50$, will you make it seven?
Lady: Tell me what you want, you just want me to wear them? Do you want me to cum in them, do you want CRAP STAINS-
Lady: like, what- what are you looking for?
Pranker: Oh, I mean, [gasps], I DIDN'T KNOW I have so many options, you know, what's on the menu, you know, uh, is anything else on the menu?
Lady: [laughing] I mean, it's up to- it's up to my client, I do what you want.
Pranker: Okay, and let's just be real, okay, let's just between you and I, no disrespecty, do you have a smelly vagina?
Lady: I do have a smelly vagina, I mean not BAD SMELLS, smells like p***y. I mean, kind of like a-
Pranker: AH BUT, COME ON NOW HON- HON- HONEY PIE, after one week it's gonna smell like crap, right?
Lady: You- I haven't had anybody ask me to wear five days, you would be my first client that I will ever wear for five straight days, okay? So-
Pranker: Oh crap. YEAH.
Lady: this will be interesting if you want me to wear them seven days, I mean, I'm single so I don't have to- you know, I don't have to really-
Lady: worry about that, but-
Pranker: But, what about like, does it cost extra for a yeast infection or same price?
Lady: I- I can't- I can't guarantee a yeast infection. [giggles]
Pranker: Okay, so there's no like a yeast infection or your money back type of thing, right, like you don't- you don't do that?
Lady: No, like I- won't be getting any yeast infections.
Pranker: I- I also kind of feel a little bit guilty, you know? Like, if somebody like might smell your vagina from your cubicle right, like if-
Pranker: you're wafting, like if you- you gonna have to keep the leg very closed, right, or you're gonna like flap it like a wingy.
Lady: Well, I work from home, so I don't have to worry about that.
Pranker: Oh crap, uh, DO YOU DO THE PANTY FULL TIME?
Lady: NO, I have a real job.
Lady: I WOULD BE BROKE IF I DID PANTIES.
Pranker: [giggles] I WAS GONNA SAY, you like a FACTORY, you like a FACTORY, you know, my- my cousin he work on a factory IN CHINA, I was gonna say-
Pranker: you produce more goods than he does [giggles], uh right?
Pranker: So, real quick, honestly, because you got me curious, what is your other gig, you know? Like, what do you do on the f- on the front end?
Pranker: Like, it kind of turn me on a little bit to know like: "Oh man, she wear the panty, she is the- the dental assistant." OH, right?
Lady: No, I work for a- I work for a bank.
Pranker: OH, OH MY GOD, you know, the idea of going to you and saying: "Excuse me, I want to deposit a one MILLION dollar, you know? But then you wearing the-
Pranker: panty for the seven day wafting is a so delicious to me honestly."
Lady: [giggles].
Pranker: YEAH, but really, what I would love to do is after one week, I would love to come visit you at your- at your bank and then just kind of take it from the window, you know?
Lady: Mm, no, I don't [giggles], I don't do that.
Pranker: ONE THOUSAND DOLLAR.
Lady: M-m, I'm not having you at my work place.
Pranker: TWO THOUSAND DOLLAR, just wear a skirt that day and then hula hoop, you know? Hula hoop it down your ankles, you know, and then give it to me.
Lady: Where are you located?
Pranker: I'm gonna fly to you, honestly, I told you money is not an issue, so I will come fly there, I have a private jet, but also, like uh the helicopter, you know?
Lady: [giggles]
Pranker: I- I- I'm not even joking by the way, like I have- I- I- I serious, I have- I have a private jet, you know?
Pranker: Hh- [speaking to Tyrone in the background]: HEY TYRONE, TALK, TY-
Pranker [speaking as Tyrone]: [explosion sound] Uh, hey- hey- what's up boo boo, how you doing?
Lady: Oh my God, I gotta go.
Pranker: Hey, hey, hey-
Lady: You two, ACK-
Pranker: no- I- I- I'M HIS ASSISTANT, I wanted to come through right quick, I think there might be like a little language barrier, something like that, so I wanted to see-
Pranker: what's popping but, based on what I could understand, like homeboy wants to come through to the bank, uh, would you be down?
Lady: No.
Pranker: Okay, but like, I think you heard him mention like money ain't problem nothing like that, so I wanted to see-
Pranker: like maybe like, you know like a THOUSAND TWO, like I- I actually I-
Lady: No.
Pranker: I actually fly the helicopter, I'm a pilot, so-
Lady: Uh, the answer is no. Is this for real? Is this a joke? Or what- where we going now?
Pranker: listen, I understand it's a little bit of gray area-
Lady: I don't think, I'm gonna get, I would maybe-
Pranker: I mean, the- the fact-
Lady: mumble- mumble?
Pranker: the fact that, I'm sure the peop- the fact that- that you sell panties people ask you is that for real or a joke too, but like-
Pranker: no, I'm being serious, you know I'm saying, like, this is the real deal, I uh-
Lady: I'm not looking to meet or meet-up with anybody or come to my real workplace, this is not something I'm doing.
Lady: People don't know that I do this. [giggles]
Pranker: I UNDERSTAND, that- that if the price is right maybe you'd be like, alright man, I don't usually do that, but like f- for-
Pranker: like TEN STACKS, I- I might be down.
Lady: Yeah, yeah I mean, sounds good, but at the end of the day, unless I have the money in my hands beforehand, no I can't do it.
Lady: I can't do anything like that.
Pranker: Got you, wha- wha- what if all three of us is down, I have my mechanic here too, he- he's also like you-
Lady: [laughing]
Pranker: I- I- I- I- I'M BEING SERIOUS, I got my mechanic Juanito, he- he might wanna get one of them uh, one of them panties too, you know what I'm saying?
Lady: Well, I only have one vagina, so, I can't wear three people's, I can't wear panties three times.
Pranker: Alright, how about this, I- I have an idea, you- you-, how about this wear three layers on top of each other, but like the one closest to your-
Pranker: vagina's the most expensive and then you start dropping them about like 25% off per layer.
Lady: [laughing]
see what we can do here.
Lady: Oh my God, you guys are funny.
Pranker [speaking as Alejandro Juan Martinez]: [explosion sound] He- HELLO.
Lady: [giggles] Who is- is this- is this the mechanic?
Pranker: Si! I- I- I WANTED TALKING TO YOU BECAUSE I- I- I SITTING HERE, they tell me ME YOU HAVING A-
Lady: Omg, stop.
Pranker: BEA- BE- VERY DELICIOUS.
Lady: [hang up]
Pranker: He- hello? [laughing] [inhale] [speaking as Russell]: Okay, I think she's unfortunately gone, uhm, [laughing], [inhale], I wanted to call her-
Pranker: someone wrote bootylicious in the comments, [speaking as Alejandro Juan Martinez]: You are very bootylicious, I wanna coming to you, por que-
Pranker: I needing one, uh- uh- uh- very dirty- very DISGUSTING.