Pissing Off A French Seduction Coach - Prank Call Classic!

Best quotes: 

• “I want to fark the girl, you know, I want to do the BOOM BOOM.”
• “I will meet you at the Statue of the Three Graces, okay? The- the three woman with the big boobies, you know what I'm talking about?”
• “LOOK MAN, A**HOLE, WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?”

Body of content:

I prank called a seduction coach in France as Buk Lau to see if he could help Buk score some French ladies! He was not amused with Buk’s angle and wanted nothing to do with coaching such a maniac. I even enlisted the help of a friend in France to try to rope him back in, check out how it went down! Let me know in the comments what type of teachers I should prank next.

 

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Transcript

[glass break sound] [phone ringing] (Segments in French are translated)

Guy: Hello?

Pranker [speaking as Buk Lau] Duh hello, yeah, ar- are you the uh the seduction guy?

Guy: What the heck is this? Euh- [laughing]

Pranker: Mu- wha- what do you say to-

Guy: it's a mistake? Ah-

Pranker: it's no mistake I call you about the- the seduction, I'm in the bathroom right now at Amorino's, I'm on a date-

Guy: where you come from?

Pranker: Yeah, I- I'm- I'm living in France now, you know, my name is Buk Lulu.

Guy: Yes, who cares?

Pranker: You know, I'm living in Montper- Montperri- Montpellier in- in the summer, you know?

Guy: Yes, who cares? What do you want?

Pranker: Uh, do you s-

Guy: What can I do for you?

Pranker: Do you speak English?

Guy: No, speak French with me, you're in France after all, what do- what do you want?

Pranker: I WANT YOUR HELP IN THE SEDUCTION, okay? I want to do the farking, I want to fark the girl, you know, I want to-

Pranker: do the BOOM BOOM.

Guy: This is a joke.

Pranker: I want to make love, you know?

Guy: Well okay, but I am a coach, I am not- I don't have any women for you.

Pranker: Yes, yes, with a girl.

Guy: No, it's-

Pranker: I want you to be my coach, okay? I want to- I pay you the money, I give you €300.

Guy: How many?!

Pranker: I give you, uh, €200?

Guy: Okay, okay, we're going to- to speak about it.

Pranker: Can you take me to the discotheque?

Guy: Oh, no, no, no, I- I- I- I'm sorry- I'm sorry, I can't understand, farking heck- [hang up]

Pranker: No, but you have to say, I have to know, how to- [laughing] [speaking to audience]: Oh my God, [inhales] okay.

[phone ringing] [explosion sound]

Guy: Hello?

Pranker: Yeah, what the FARK man, why do you- why do you hang up on me, you know?

Guy: What do you want la, ah yes?

Pranker: I- I need a seduction help, okay? I need to make a sexy time with a French woman, you understand?

Guy: Uh yes, me- it's- i- i- i- it's not my job if you need a- a- a prostitute, ah- ah- I- I- I help the- the shyness-

Guy: ah people, it's nothing to do with uh- with uh- a search with a girlfriend uh-

Pranker: No, no, I know that, I know that-

Guy: uh escort girl.

Pranker: I- I know that, I already have the girl, you know, you just have to teach me how to do the dirty thing with her, you know?

Pranker: Ho- how I can try to learn how to, you know, be seducing? How to make her, you know, how to make her pantie fall off, you understand?

Guy: Look- I- I- I need to- to speak with you uh, I've got time Thursday, it's possible? To see you Thursday?

Pranker: Yu- I am very horny, you know, I'm very horny, understand?

Guy: I'm a coach, look, I need to see you, w- we can- uh- meet and to speak about what we want exactly uh-

Pranker: I- I will meet you at the Statue of the Three Graces, okay? The- the tre-

Guy: Okay.

Pranker: the three woman with the big boobies, you know what I'm talking about?

Guy: What?!

Pranker: LOOK MAN, A**HOLE, WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?

Guy: Bon, okay, uh, if you want to meet with me it will be better to see you uh, in reality.

Pranker: Okay, tell me this-

Guy: Possible?

Pranker: yeah, it's possible, how many girls have you been with? Do you know yourself? I want to know-

Pranker: because if you're qualified?

Guy: It nothing to do with that, I'm a coach, okay, you have to speak with another pe- ah- another people, I'm not a pimp-

Guy: with girls, nothing to do- I'm a coach, I help you- I am-

Pranker: I- I know but- I was-

Guy: I- I- I HAVEN'T GOT ANY WOMAN WITH ME.

Pranker: I KNOW, I KNOW, I don't want a woman from you, I am asking you, how many women do you have a sexy time?

Pranker: You know- you- yourself, you- I'm just wondering how many women do you make a BOOM BOOM with, you know?

Guy: Oh my- what the heck are you talking about? I'm sorry, bye.

Pranker: A**HOLE-

Guy: I want nothing to do with this- [hang up]

Pranker: MOTHERFARKA WHAT DI- WHAT do you say? [laughing] [speaking to audience]: WHAT DID HE SAY AT THE END? I tried calling this guy-

Pranker: every few days for a entire month. He did not wanna talk to me and would hang up the second he heard my voice.

Pranker: I had a friend living in France call him back with me and help rope him in. Check this out.

[phone ringing]

Guy: Hello?

Friend: Hello, good evening?

Guy: Hello, good evening?

Friend: Yes, I would like some more information about the a seduction coaching classes you offer?

Guy: First of all, are you a man or woman?

Friend: I am a woman.

Guy: Have y- have you visited my site uh- [censored]?

Friend: Yes, I did visit your website, but I need a bit of help, it's for-

Guy: Yes.

Friend: coaching sessions, I see that you do coaching sessions in the evening in restaurants and in night-clubs-

Friend: and I would like to come with one of my co-workers-

Guy: Yes, okay.

Friend: we work together in the same company we both struggle at being seductive and at finding love [giggles].

Guy: Okay.

Friend: We would like to do a session together, he desperately want to speak with you- wanting to ask you questions-

Friend: I'll pass him to you. [giggles]

Guy: Okay, put him on the line.

Friend: I'll pass him to you.

Pranker: [explosion sound] Uh yeah man, uh- he- hello?

Guy: Hello?

Pranker: Yeah, so when can we meet up man? I've been waiting here for like three weeks in front of the- the three statues, right?

Guy: [mumbling] PASS THE PHONE BACK TO YOUR FRIEND, GIVE ME YOUR FRIEND.

Pranker: Okay, you want my friend, the- bu- bu- but, okay-

Guy: In French.

Pranker: but- but I have- I- I told my friend to talk to you,right? So that, you can- you can talk.

Guy: Yes, yes, it's- it's easier, yes.

Pranker: You- you don't want to talk to me about- I had to pay her the money, you know, I had to pay her like a- like a fifty dollar, uh-

Pranker: fifty euro, you know, to talk for me, you know?

Guy: Oh la la la la, uh-

Pranker: Look man, look-

Guy: uh, se bo-

Pranker: look- look- b- b- BASICALLY WHAT I WANT TO DO IS, I WANT TO FARK SOME BITCHES, you understand? I want to fark some French bitches, right?

Pranker: They are so beautiful, de-

Guy: oh la la la la, what the heck is wrong with this guy, screw this. [hang up]

Pranker: bu- w- what- uh- but I'm ready to pay any money man, I pay you the money right now. [laughing]