Real Estate Prank Call Featuring Juan!

Best quotes: 

• “NAME YOUR PRICE!”
• “My cousin Tyrone…. He’s adopted.”
• “When Cinco de Mayo comes around, I will invite you over por some MARGARITAS!”

Body of content:

I prank called an old lady who lives in a mostly Hispanic neighborhood, and insisted that she sell me her home. I told her it would be for me and all of my extended family to move into and grow our community. Her nephew sent me the prank request and said she isn't very fond of the Hispanic people buying up the real estate in her neighborhood and refuses to sell them her home. 

Naturally, she was a perfect candidate for a call from Juan! I tried to offer her ridiculously inflated prices for her home, but she wouldn’t crack! Not even margaritas with Juanito for Cinco de Mayo won her over. This lady isn’t moving for ANYTHING. Did you enjoy this silly real estate prank? Tell me in the comments! 

 

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Transcript

[Phone ringing]

Homeowner: Hello?

Pranker: Hola. Como estas?  Can I talk to Maria, please?

Homeowner: This is she.

Pranker: Hello. How are you doing?

Homeowner: Fine. Thank you.

Pranker: Excellent! My name is Juan Martinez. I'm calling about -- well, I want to asking you one question about your home.

Homeowner: Okay.

Pranker: Si. Okay. I'm wondering here how much money you're costing for you to sell to me your house?

Homeowner: I don't want to sell my house.

Pranker: Name your price?

Homeowner: I don't want to SELL IT.

Pranker: I understand but I'm wondering porque if the price is right maybe you will do it.

Homeowner: NO! I don't want to sell my house. I've been in there 17 years and I'm not leaving.

Pranker: Okay. But I-, I-, I-, me and my familia, we are hoping to-, to-, the money is not a problem

Pranker: but we want to develop the Hispanic community here after the IMMIGRATION REFORM and-, and,  bring my EXTENDED

Pranker: FAMILIA to live with us HERE in the neighborhood 

Homeowner: Uh-huh.

Pranker: Si.

Homeowner: Okay. Well, I'm not-, I'm not interested in selling my home.

Pranker: Okay, $500,000.

Homeowner: I'M NOT interested in selling MY HOUSE, sir.

Pranker: ONE MILLION DOLLAR?

Homeowner: I'm not interested. How did you get my phone number?

Pranker: PLEA-, you tengo el Whitepages.

Homeowner: Okay.

Pranker: Si.

Homeowner: Well, I don't know how it got there, but I'm not selling-

Pranker: But YOUR HOME is so beautiful. I'm wanting to bring my familia there. They like it VERY MUCH.

Homeowner: Okay, that's good, but I'm not SELLING MY HOUSE.

Pranker: NAME YOUR PRICE!

Homeowner: I-, do-, [Yelling] WHAT PART OF I'M NOT SELLING IT YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND?!

Pranker: No hablo.

Homeowner: I like my house.

Pranker: But I like it.

Homeowner: I like my house.

Pranker: Me gusto. I-, I-, I like it a lot.

Homeowner: Yes. And I'm sure you do, but I'm not selling it. It's not for sale, it will never be for sale but

Pranker: Porque, por que, we-, we-, we need one place to stay. My grandmother, my grandfather, my cousin Lucy

Pranker: cousin Louie, cousin Geraldo, cousin Garcia, cousin Juan, cousin Maria, cousin Tyrone, he's adopted, and ALL MY FRIEND

Homeowner: Okay. Well, I'm not selling it.

Pranker: TWO MILLION DOLLAR! 

Homeowner: Sir! I DON'T WANT TO HANG UP ON YOU. I don't want to hang up on you and be rude.

Pranker: But por que.

Homeowner: But I don't want to sell it.

Pranker: But it's a SPANISH neighborhood.

Homeowner: I don't care!

Pranker: You know, Cinco de Mayo, when Cinco de Mayo comes around I will invite you over for margarita

Pranker: some-, some-, some-, some dancing-, some food-, some-, some fajita

Homeowner: Okay.

Pranker: Some tequila.

Homeowner: That's wonderful.

Pranker: Yeah.

Homeowner: But I'M NOT SELLING MY HOUSE!

Pranker: Okay.

Homeowner: So this is the last time. Thank you very much. 

Pranker: Okay.

Homeowner: Please don't call me again.

Pranker: TWO POINT FIVE MILLION! 

Homeowner: Bye.

 [Hang up]