Outrageous Pranks In The Hood - Robber Prank Call

Best quotes: 

• “That's why I stole it right? To use it, not just look at it."
• “OH MY DAYS”
• “How come you can call me BRUV and I cannot call you BRUV?! You can BRUV, I can't BRUV?!”

Body of content:

I pulled off a prank call on a guy in the hood in the UK who was robbed by a Pakistani guy and had his wallet taken, and the robber made a mess of the house too! I called as Rakesh and tried to negotiate a trade to give the victim his stuff back, and he absolutely lost his mind. 

The person who requested the prank sent me a bunch of information on the prank target and the robbery, so I was able to make the call super convincing and crazy! The guy’s epic accent combined with his absolute rage was made this call too funny!! Don’t worry, he took the whole thing really well in the end. 

Would you like to see more prank calls with a “robber” calling back their victims? What type of crazy scenarios should I try for future pranks in the hood? Tell me in the comments!

 

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Transcript

Pranker [speaking to audience]: So this guy in the UK lives in the hood and got

Pranker: robbed by a Pakistani guy. He's been super pissed about it ever since.

Pranker: So I decided to call him up as the thief.

[phone ringing]

Robbed guy: Hello?

Pranker [speaking as Rakesh]: Yeah hello, can I talk to Mo please?

Robbed guy: Talk to who?

Pranker: Yeah, how are you doing Mo?

Pranker: How are you doing? My name is Rakesh, I just wanted to

Pranker: call and get something off my chest.

Robbed guy: So-so do I personally know who you are?

Pranker: Yeah, we met once... One time for a few seconds.

Robbed guy: And when was that?

Pranker: It was on, actually-

Pranker: It was precisely uh... May 13th.

Robbed guy: We met on May 13th?

Pranker: You know right, I was- you know I came to visit the house and stuff right?

Pranker: We met very briefly right? And... I run away.

Robbed guy: You came up to my house and then you ran off?

Pranker: Right.

Robbed guy: OH MY DAYS ARE YOU THE ONE WHO FARKING BROKE INTO MY HOUSE MAN?

Pranker: Uh... I wouldn't put it like that...

Pranker: Uh... But uh...

Robbed guy: Oh my farking days blud- I will smack your blud- bruv-

Robbed guy: you do got like 2 minutes to talk right now or otherwise

Robbed guy: I swear down I'm taking action on this crap.

Pranker: Uh, no but you know, I wanted to you know, come clean, right.

Robbed guy: COME CLEAN WITH WHAT? Bruv- YOU TOOK MY WALLET, YOU TOOK MY CRAP yeah?

Robbed guy: YOU BROKE MY OUTSIDE GARDEN GLASS THAT COST ME LIKE THOUSAND POUNDS ARE YOU STUPID?

Robbed guy: I need my wallet right now.

Pranker: S-S-Stop it, stop it man.

Pranker: Look I just- can you just forgive me please?

Robbed guy: FORGIVE Y- bruh are you stupid, yeah? You ca- LISTEN,

Robbed guy: I need my wallet right now. I got- bruh I live in a hood yeah?

Robbed guy: I got bare people, I can come yeah and I can slit you up,

Robbed guy:  I'm telling you bruh. You're done.

Pranker: Look man, I also have- I have like a Pakistani army of people too

Pranker: if you want we can come get the other joystick okay?

Pranker: But don't fark around, stop it.

Robbed guy: Y-Y- are you telling me to fark up? All the police are over you bruh.

Robbed guy: The police em- everyone is after you. Give me your address,

Robbed guy: I'm coming down to your house and I'm taking my stuff back.

Pranker: Look, uh... Can I just- can we give it to a-a mediator like Rana or something?

Robbed guy: Oh my go- I can't believe it bruh...

Robbed guy: There is some kind of a farking dream or something.

Pranker: How about- I give you the wallet back just give me like, you know hundred pounds.

Robbed guy: YOU WANT ME TO GIVE YOU A FARKING HUNDRED POUND.

Robbed guy: WHY DON'T YOU JUST BRING THE FARKING STUFF BACK?

Pranker: I got away, I felt pretty good about it you know I jus-

Pranker: I-I try to use some of the stuff right I even got like a discount on a car rental

Pranker: one time and [inhales] I-I just started to feel bad.

Robbed guy: OH MY GOD. I'm calling the farking army on you, you stupid motherfarker!

Pranker: It was just a discount right, it doesn't hurt you in a way, right? Does it hurt?

Robbed guy: WHAT DO YOU MEAN DISCOUNT, IT'S GOT MY FARKING NAME ON IT

Robbed guy: YOU USED IT LIKE 3-4 TIMES, ARE YOU STUPID?

Pranker: Yeah, but that's why I stole it. To use it.

Pranker: Right? Not to just look at it.

Robbed guy: I can't believe I'm talk- OH MY GOD!

Robbed guy: Sounds like some kind of a farking nightmare.

Robbed guy: Listen, you're bringing my stuff right now you're bringing my wallet

Robbed guy: and you're calling Avis. Yeah, I got your information,

Robbed guy: so don't farking try to run away from it I'm c- and listen yeah

Robbed guy: try to run away from it I'm c- and listen yeah

Robbed guy: you're bringing my stuff, you're calling Avis back

Robbed guy: and you're telling them that you're the one who need the discount,

Robbed guy: you're the one who stole my card.

Pranker: Yeah, but I told you I-I-I- my bad man, sorry about that.

Pranker: So are we good?

Robbed guy: Sorry about what? NO! WE'RE FARKING NOT GOOD BRO YOU'RE BRINGING MY STUFF-

Pranker: [inhales] Okay look, how about we meet at- uh...

Pranker: We can-we can meet up uh- for a sandwich at Subway

Pranker: I don't know if Rana still works there but she can make it for us...

Pranker: ...and we can sit down and talk.

Robbed guy: OH MY FARKING DAYS! Bro listen you're pissing me off right now.

Robbed guy: DON'T FARKING BRING MY GIRLFRIEND TO THIS I'M TELLING YOU LET'S

Robbed guy: SORT THIS OUT NOW YEAH AND THERE WILL BE NO MESS.

Pranker: But how-how much money do you remember having in there?

Robbed guy: How much m- you farking tell me how much money was in the wallet you motherfarker,

Robbed guy:  you the one...

Pranker: I don't kn-

Robbed guy: ...who farking stole my wallet!

Pranker: Yeah but I got a couple bitches that night, I don't remember...

Pranker: I got so farked up man, I don't remember how much is inside.

Robbed guy: You used my money on-on bitches?

Robbed guy: You son of a  bitch!

Pranker: But I had to get my d**k wet, right? I was horny, right?

Robbed guy: Bruh why are you farking telling me this crap.

Pranker: Because-

Robbed guy: I don't give a fark whether you were horny or not!

Pranker: But y-

Robbed guy: You d-you d-you don't even have a d**k dude you know what you are?

Robbed guy: You're not even a man, bruh you got a farking vagina that-that's what you have.

Pranker: Oh-

Robbed guy: Farkin woman you are, you bring my money bruh. I'm telling you.

Pranker: Okay, look stop it okay, I am sick and tir-

Pranker: I have been nothing but nice to you and you are being mother ugly ass***e guy!

Robbed guy: NICE TO ME yeah?

Pranker: STOP IT, STOP IT-

Robbed guy: FARK YOU YOU SON OF A BITCH

Pranker: YOU FUC-

Robbed guy: WHAT DO YOU MEAN NICE TO ME?

Pranker: YOU-YOU-

Robbed guy: YOU STOLE MY FARKING STUFF AND YOU COME TO ME...

Pranker: YOU MOTHER FARKER-

Robbed guy: ...CALLING ME BACK YOU TELLING ME THAT GO-

Pranker: YOU-

Robbed guy: Motherfarker you farking [mumbling] bitch!

Robbed guy: Give me the farking money back!

Pranker: Motherfarker DON'T TALK TO ME LIKE THAT!

Robbed guy: What-

Pranker: I am getting upset.

Robbed guy: Are you high bruh?

Robbed guy: Are you farking high?

Pranker: STOP IT!

Pranker: Stop it right now.

Robbed guy: What the fark am I talking to?

Robbed guy: Bruh some kind of a knobhead. Listen bring-bring my stuff back.

Pranker: MOTHER FARKER TELL ME YOU FORGIVE ME AND THEN MAYBE...

Pranker: ...I WILL BRING IT okay? But first you have to s-

Robbed guy: Farking WHAT THE FARK you're telling me to forgive you?

Robbed guy: GO FARK YOURSELF YOU SON OF A BITCH!

Pranker: I WANT- I- MOTHER FARKER I WANT TO SLEEP TONIGHT.

Pranker: WHAT DO YOU S-

Robbed guy: I SAID FARK YOU THAT'S...

Pranker: YOU GOING YOU WANT ME-

Robbed guy: ...WHAT I SAID!

Pranker: YOU WANT ME TO COME BACK THERE AGAIN AND TAKE THE OTHER JOYSTICK MOTHERFARKER?

Robbed guy: OH I DARE YOU BRUH COME-COME and bring all the stuff back yeah?

Robbed guy: And I'm telling you bring all them-all them people...

Robbed guy: ...that you have and come down right now to my house.

Pranker: Okay.

Robbed guy: I dare you I'm gonna get the whole hood after your ass...

Robbed guy: ...and I'm gonna FARK YOU UP I'm telling you to take this as a guarantee.

Pranker: Yeah, but uh... Do you have-

Pranker: I don't remember, do you have like a muscle and...

Pranker: ...and stuff like that or are you scrawny guy?

Robbed guy: OH MY GOD bruh you taking the farking piss-

Robbed guy: Listen, tell me wh-where you are right now.

Pranker: Ok, honest-honestly I am-I am in [censured] shopping centre right now.

Robbed guy: [censured] shop- are you taking the piss fam?

Pranker: No, no I am right here, I'm in front of the Avis.

Robbed guy: You farking stupid son of a bit-

Robbed guy: Go right now- There's-there's someone there whose called Valentina.

Robbed guy: Tell her you the one who farking used-used my discount code.

Pranker: Okay alright l-l-let me go find her.

Pranker: W-what does she look like?

Robbed guy: She-she's blonde Romanian girl.

Pranker: Okay. H-hold on.

Pranker [in the background]: I want to put in a complaint about Mo.

Pranker: Yeah he is the a**hole guy.

Robbed guy: WANNA COMPLAIN YOU FARKING SON OF A BITCH-

Pranker: Yeah, I ti- you know last time I was here I was...

Pranker: ...just trying to get a rental but he was really racist to me and I was really upset...

Pranker: Yeah, yeah...

Robbed guy: Racist to you you son of a bitch?!

Pranker: Yeah he-he truly was the a**hole guy.

Robbed guy: Oh my fark, fark you-

Pranker: Yeah. Okay but yeah-

Pranker: Do you have like a feedback card I can fill it out?

Pranker: Okay. Great. Uh... Thanks, thanks.

Pranker: Uh, yeah I-I told her.

Robbed guy: Have you lost your farking brain? Have y-

Robbed guy: Well I wanna fark up your whole family whether it is...

Robbed guy: ...global or not, you son of a bitch.

Robbed guy: I'm international bruh, you don't know who you're messing with.

Pranker: Look, my habibi, I don't want you to be upset okay?

Pranker: Let's move on.

Robbed guy: You calling me habibi now? You farking stupid idiot!

Robbed guy: D***head yeah, what are you calling me habibi for?

Robbed guy: Are you stupid?

Pranker: Isn't that my-

Robbed guy: Tell me who told you about my girlfriend?

Pranker: Uh... To be honest I didn't want to tell you this but...

Pranker: You essentially got my sloppy seconds with Rana, okay?

Robbed guy: You fark- she ain't farking with farking Indians you son of a bitch.

Pranker: [sigh] You'd be surprised man. When-

Pranker: ...when usually- when girls see my chicken tikka masala...

Pranker: ...downstairs they are all about it.

Robbed guy: You- FARK YOUR CHICKEN TIK- YOU NASTY

Robbed guy: SON OF A BITCH YOU FARKING-

Robbed guy: Wh-WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT MAN? WH-WHAT CHICKEN...

Robbed guy: ...TIKA AND ALL THAT FARKING STUPID CRAP YOU SAYING!

Robbed guy: YOU FARKING ROBBED MY BLOODY HOUSE!

Pranker: Listen motherfarker it happened-

Pranker: IT HAPPENED SO LONG AGO YOU ARE NEVER GOING TO

Robbed guy: FARK YOU!

Pranker: FIND ME ANYWAYS I'M DOING YOU A FAVOR!

Robbed guy: BRUH I'M FARKING CALLING THE POLICE!

Robbed guy: LISTEN YEAH I'M A HANG UP RIGHT NOW

Robbed guy: AND I'M FARKING YOU UP. WATCH THIS! [hang up]

Pranker: Okay, you want to be a little bitch-

Pranker: [laughs] He farking hang up!

Pranker [speaking to audience]: Alright, calling again... Oh my god...

[phone ringing]

Robbed guy: DON'T FARKING CALL ME AGAIN ARE YOU STUPID?

Robbed guy: I'M TELLING YOU I'M REPORTING THIS TO THE FARKING POLICE

Pranker: Look- I am t-that's not going to do anything

Pranker: so I'm trying to come to other arrangement okay?

Pranker: Work with me okay? Stop it.

Robbed guy: Bruh, I don't work for you  you son of a-

Robbed guy: YOU WORK FOR ME I TELL YOU WHAT TO DO.

Robbed guy: LISTEN, I'M CHASING YOU DOWN WHEREVER YOU GONNA BE BRUH.

Robbed guy: Even a mosqueI'm chasing you there and I'm-and I'm-

Robbed guy: farking splitting your-your arse in half I'm telling you, it's for sure.

Pranker: Why-why do you want to do the gay things man,

Pranker: I don't do that I just- let's talk like- let's d-do it face to face,

Pranker: but don't have to put it in my but and all these things.

Pranker: Stop it.

Robbed guy: Oh my god, you so fresh, bruh, you so fresh...

Robbed guy: You so fresh, listen, you want to sort crap out or not?

Robbed guy: Tell me right now.

Pranker: I do bro but b-bro

Pranker: Bro-bro okay, bro-bro-

Robbed guy: DON'T CALL ME BRO BRUH LOOK SO FRESH

Pranker: But you- HOW COME YOU CAN CALL ME BRUH BUT I CANNOT CALL

Pranker: YOU BRO YOU CAN BRUH I CAN'T BRUH

Robbed guy: Because you ain't my bruh you son of a bitch that's why.

Pranker: YOU CALL ME BRUH!

Robbed guy: I NEVER CALLED YOU BRUH!

Pranker: YOU CALL ME!

Robbed guy: Give me my money!

Pranker: YOU CALL ME BRUH MAYBE 300 TIMES

Robbed guy: I DON'T GIVE A CRAP now let's just get to the point yeah

Pranker: Yeah okay, okay, okay, okay, ah...

Robbed guy: Go on man farking spit it out!

Pranker: I was g- ah... I was going to tell you who was involved right?

Robbed guy: Alright, go on.

Pranker: Okay, look, I worked with your friend Hashim and he help me out.

Robbed guy: Oh you SON OF A FARKING oh my days

Robbed guy: I'm farking this guy up. I've trusted this guy so bad!

Pranker: Yeah.

Robbed guy: You and-and-and-and your mate that son of a bitch...

Robbed guy: ...that I've trusted Hashim will both will- be dead in...

Robbed guy: the next 5 minutes, I promise you, watch this.

Robbed guy: FARK YOU don't call again you son of a bitch!

Pranker: Look- I have the truth let me tell you. Hold on.

[phone call ends]

Pranker: Hold on, hold o- [laughing]

Pranker [speaking to audience]: I gotta call back, I gotta tell him...

Pranker: his friend was in on it otherwise he's gonna be farking heated.

[phone ringing]

Robbed guy: CALL AGAIN I'M FARKING CALLING THE POLICE!

Pranker: Look, I- I HAVE TO TELL YOU SOMETHING!

Pranker: Last thing I- you want to hear this okay?

Robbed guy: WHAT? Go on.

Robbed guy: Hurry up.

Pranker: Your-your friend [speaking as Russell] set up a prank on you...

Pranker: ...none of this is actually true.

Robbed guy: Oh my days-

Pranker: Listen- you're-

Robbed guy: I lost my brain.

Pranker: Oh my god, your reaction honestly was so amazing...

Pranker: I'm sorry for... [music playing]