Walmart Fitting Room Complaint - Groped Prank Call

Best quotes: 

• “She essentially tries to like, raise my pants, cup the ballsack, and readjust my shawarma downstairs.”
• “Yes, I was touched in the ballsack but, silver lining, I have like a $50 shopping spree for us.”
• “Yeah the least you could do is like take me out to dinner first.”

Body of content:

In this crazy prank call on Walmart, I told them Abdo was GROPED in their fitting room by one of their own employees!! When Abdo tried to get a free shopping trip as compensation for the humiliation he endured, the employees were less than willing to help him out! Should Abdo call more stores to see how they react to a groping story like this one? Tell me what you thought of the prank in the comments below!

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Transcript

[phone calling]

Employee: Customer service?

Pranker [speaking as Abdo]: Yeah hello, how are you doing?

Employee: Good, how are you?

Pranker: Not too good. You know, I had like the bad experience with Walmart, I wanted to talk with somebody about it.

Employee: Okay?

Pranker: Yeah, you see like, I went there in the fitting room to try on the trunks, and you know...

Pranker: ... I was putting it on, I pull the string, I tell her "Yeah I think it's not good, I need another size"

Pranker: ... and then she comes inside with me and she says "Oh no, you have to just loosen it up a little bit". Right?

Pranker: So she's wrapping her hands around me like, going around, you know, standing behind me very up close...

Pranker: ... and personal [inhale] and you know, she essentially tries to like, raise my pants, cup the ballsack...

Pranker: ... and readjust my shawarma downstairs.

Employee: Okay, uhm, I'm gonna try to help you out, because I understand where you're coming from...

Pranker: Yeah.

Employee: I wouldn't want you know-

Pranker: You wouldn't want somebody cupping your ballsack.

Employee: I am-

Employee: Right.

Pranker: Do you have a phone in the- in the fitting room, like is there somebody there right now?

Employee: Uhm, let me check, I'ma transfer you over there, okay?

Pranker: Yeah, yeah, go, go.

Employee: Okay.

[phone ringing]

Employee2: Walmart?

Pranker: Yeah, how are you doing?

Employee2: Good, how are you?

Pranker: Yeah, I'm okay like, are you the department for the fitting room area?

Employee2: Yes!

Pranker: Oh, okay, great. I don't know if it was you maybe. But like, I was there yesterday and I was trying some swimming trunks in the fitting room...

Pranker: She- essentially like- essentially like CUPS MY BALLSACK and my shawarma downstairs right?

Pranker: Like she, cups it and readjust.

Employee2: Okay, okay uh- It wasn't me because I don't remember any of that.

Pranker: Yeah but are you a very sweet, beautiful white lady?

Employee2: Yes!

Pranker: Yeah I think-

Employee2: [giggles]

Pranker: I think it might have been you. Like- I remmber like- yeah but so like-

Employee3: Dan speaking, can I help you?

Pranker: [sigh] Yeah hello Da- I was having a conversation here, a second ago. Uh, who are you?

Employee3: I am the co-manager.

Pranker: I feel like a little bit violated you know, like I got a little excited downstairs, I told my wife about it...

Pranker: ... and she was very pissed off, she wants to divorce me, so like it's ruining my life.

Employee3: I'd- I'd be completely violated too!

Pranker: I- yeah as I said it was ike a very sweet white lady very cute right? And then I asked the lady on the phone...

Pranker: ..."Are you like a very sweet white lady, very cute?" and she says "Yes", so I think it was her.

Employee2: No- It wasn't me sir!

Employee3: I'll find out who it is and I'll make sure that they don't ever do that again.

Pranker: So, on the lighter note, since you are like the manager, big boss man, you think you can give me like a- COUPON or something?

Pranker: Like a shopping spree, like, I don't know. Like, what can you do- you tell me, right?

Employee3: Uhm, the most I'll give you is a $10 gift card for the trouble.

Pranker: Oh- Oh c-

Employee3: ...of what she did.

Pranker: Ten dollars? Come on man, I feel like people charge like 100-200 dollars for this types-

Employee3: Okay?

Employee3: Well one, I gotta find out who it is.

Pranker: Yeah I know man but like, my wife, she kicked me out of the house, so I want to be able to come back inside...

Pranker: ... and be like you know, "Yes, I was touched in the ballsack but, silver lining, I have like a $50 shopping spree for us".

Employee3: Well for protocol, that's what I have to do first. I'll look at the video and find out who was over there.

Pranker: Okay, alright. Alright. Alright.

Employee3: Alright, thank you very much for uh, calling Abdul.

Pranker: Yeah, thank- thank you for the, you know. The tease.

Employee3: Alright, thank you.

Pranker [speaking to audience]: I'm gonna call back.

[phone ringing]

Employee: Walmart!

Pranker: Yeah hello, it's me again, the manager told me to call back.

Employee: He did? For what?

Pranker: He just told me I could talk to you directly and maybe get like a small apology, just because, you know what you did.

Employee: I- NO! That wasn't me!

Pranker: Yeah the least you could do is like take me out to dinner first. You know what I mean like...

Employee: Whoa...

Pranker: [sigh]

Employee3: Dan speaking, how can I help you?

Pranker: Uh, yeah hello. It's- it's Abdo again. How are you doing?

Employee3: Yes, uhm Abdul, uh you are stalking my associate. I'ma submit your phone number to the police department. Okay?

Pranker: E- eh- EXCUSE ME? [stuttering] Excus-

Employee3: Okay? Because it'll give me your phone number because you're asking her out for a date, and you are stalking my associate.

Pranker: [stuttering]

Pranker: [stuttering] You're telling me I wanted to ask her- I have three wives man.

Pranker: You think I don't have enough already? Like I want to take her hand-

Employee3: Eh- I don't care how many wives you have. Yeah.

Pranker: Your high horse habibi L- I just wanted to get an apology. She told me it was her at first.

Employee3: SHE IS NOT THE ONE THAT DID IT, OKAY?

Pranker: Look, look. I put two and two together right, you know I was cupped by like a very beautiful, cute, caucasian-

Employee3: And that's not who you're talking to. I can tell you that right now.

Pranker: So- so, what you're saying is, she's like UGLY right?

Employee3: I am not gonna tell you what she is, but I can tell you that I am going to find out who you are, and I'm gonna hit 69...

Pranker: Stop it.

Pranker: Stop it.

Employee3: It'll give me your phone number on my line right here and I will submit your name to the police department as a stalker for her.

Pranker: Look- look- look- look- look- look-

Pranker: Look, Liam Neeson, relax. Okay? Look, I don't want to play these games. I just wanted a quick apology and...

Pranker: ... you're trying to turn it around on me.

Employee3: You want an apology but the person that did it is not here.

Pranker: Uh, man, you're so difficult.

Employee3: Thank you very much.

Pranker: I want an apology from you to- ha- hallo?

Pranker: [laughing]

[phone ringing]

Employee2: Walmart.

Pranker: Yeah, hello Handsy uh, could you just, please say sorry?

Employee2: Are you serious?

Pranker: Yeah, yeah, just real quick. Like-

Employee2: It wasn't me!

Pranker: Yeah, but, okay. How big are your hands?

Pranker: A-are they clammy?

Employee3: Dan speaking, can I help you?

Pranker: Yeah Dan, what's up man? Long time no chat. My wife, she ripped into me man.

Employee3: Well y- that's because you keep calling the store.

Pranker: N- no, she called me "Liar liar, pants on fire!" It- I- it reminded me of my grade school days.

Pranker: It really, really hurt.

Employee3: Yeah, you just keep calling back, reminds me of my grade school days, when I'm calling and so you just need to stop calling her.

Pranker: Look, Ned Flanders, relax. Work with me.

Pranker: I-I just want- hello?

Pranker: [laughing] Couldn't help it... [laughing] Dude, he said like farking- He really sounds like Ned Flanders!